A little funny....maybe

:-)Rocky

I'm working on it.....

:-)Rocky

Did you hear about the teacher who was helping one of her kindergarten students put on his boots?
The student asked for help and she could see why.
Even with her pulling and him pushing, the little boots still didn’t want to go on.
By the time they got the second boot on, she had worked up a sweat.
She almost cried when the little boy said “teacher they are on the wrong feet.”
She looked, and sure enough they were.
She managed to keep her cool, as together, they worked to get the boots back on, this time on the correct feet.
He then announced, “These aren’t my boots.”
She bit her tongue, rather than get right in his face and scream “Why didn’t you say so?” like she wanted to.
No sooner had they got the boots off when he said “They’re my brother’s boots. My Mom made me wear them”.
Now she did not know if she should laugh or cry.
But she mustered up what grace and courage she had left to wrestle the boots on his feet again.
Helping him get on his coat, she asked “ where are your mitts?” He said “I stuffed them in the toes of my boots”.
She will be eligible for parole in three years.

Reminds me of a true story from the wife of a good friend of mine. This was in the Houston area and the wife has to take their 3 kids to a semi formal Christmas party at her husband's work place in downtown Houston. On the way her kids were raising hell in the back seat and she couldn't reach them to spank them. She finally got so frustrated that she pulled over on the side of the freeway, opened the back door and got all 3 kids out and spanked all 3 of them and told them not to say one more word until they got to the husband's work place. That seemed to work, and the back seat was quiet. When they got to his office, she lined up the kids for inspection and the middle boy, 9 years old, was smiling very big. When she inspected his clothes, she saw where he was missing a shoe. Upon asking him where it was, he said back where she wacked him and said not to say another word. Lol.

Pap

A Scottish man moves to Canada, one day he decides to visit a local bar, he notices an animal head mounted on the wall.

He asks the bartender, "What is that?"

"A Moose," says the bartender.

"Fock me, how big are the cats here?!?"

A guy is driving around the back woods of North Georgia, when he sees a sign in front of a broken down house ‘Talking Dog For Sale’. He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador sitting there.

“You talk?” he says. “Yep” the dog replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog speak, he says “So, what’s your story?”

The Lab looks up and says, “Well. I discovered I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.”

“I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running, but the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.”
“I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I’m retired.”

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

“Ten dollars.” the guy says.

“Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?”

“Because he’s a liar. He never did any of that stuff.”

NOW WE’RE PROBABLY GONNA SEE SOME SNOWFLAKE GET OFFENDED BY THIS 🙄

Pap--

Chocolate, yellow, or black?

Larry

Actually, it was a micarta brown color as I recall. Not available anymore.

Pap