Love it.

Pap

FYI, The California D.O.T found over 200 dead crows on California Highways recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be from vehicular impacts. However, during analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the ...bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with motorbikes, while only 2% were killed by cars.
The Agency then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of motorbike kills versus car kills. The Ornithological Behaviorist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger. They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "bike".

A horse walk into a bar. Sits down at the bar. The bartender walks over and says to the horse: "Hey Buddy: Why the long face"?

A Skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

I told my doctor I broke my arm in two places. He told me I should stop going to those places.

HEY FOLKS, THEY'RE HERE ALL WEEK!

...TRY THE VEAL!

A man told his wife they had to maintain social distance because of the corona virus.

She took him at his word...cleaned out their bank accounts, and is now sailing in the Caribbean.

He is unemployed...and waiting for the house to be foreclosed.

Maybe not so funny, more like pathetic.

AND DON'T FORGET TO TIP YOUR SERVER!